Heaven's Roar - Picture of Male Lion
Heaven's Roar - Picture of female lion

Definitions of Radical

Dictionary - Basic, Innate, Fundamental
Colloquial - Revolutionary, On the Edge
Personal - Raw revolutionary life with
The Lion of Judah - Jesus Christ

Heaven's Roar. Road of a radical.

Miracles & Tesimonies


Rejoice in the Lord always and again I say rejoice! Philippians 4:4

The Creator describes Himself as having a humble heart (Matthew 11:29) – but while Jesus the Saviour is the Servant of all, Jesus the King is Mighty God. This section has verified testimonies from ordinary people who have experienced the wonders of the God of Miracles because He delights in touching, blessing, and surprising us.

“Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, today, and forever” – Hebrews 13:8.





Afshin Javid – ex Hezbollah – is now pastor at Vancouver Christian Fellowship. He met Jesus in person in a Malaysian prison cell after being caught with false passports he was carrying for jihadists in Hezbollah. He got a visit from satan and his god and prayers that were meant to specifically deal with the devil were powerless. Then Jesus turned up and told him to ask Him for help. In desperation he did and satan’s presence instantly left. Wanting a bible he suddenly found he could read English – having never learned it. He has written his own testimony – read his incredible story at: http://www.canadianchristianity.com/cgi-bin/bc.cgi?bc/bccn/0305/03iranian.

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On Sunday 24 Feb 2008 we had a guest speaker at church who was one of the ministers from the Lakeland revival that was burning like fire in Florida. Kevin Ford was a breed I’d not seen the like of before – he was kinda wild and while flicking through the scriptures at the pulpit would spontaneously rap out prayers and psalms. They rhymed – he was a good rapper! He told of an extraordinary healing God had used him for, so when he asked if anyone wanted prayer I went up. I’d had a damaged spine from an injury for 13 years. My pelvis had also been damaged which had caused ligaments to seize up and made my left leg slightly shorter and my left hip joint spongy and squishy to walk on with each step. Needless to say walking was not easy. I asked him to pray for my back and the moment he began God gave him a ‘word of knowledge’. He said he needed to pray for my legs instead as the left one was shorter than the right (I’d told him nothing of this). He sat me down, stretched my legs out with my ankles resting on his open hands, and as he silently prayed we both watched my leg grow out in his hand. I didn’t feel anything in my leg – I just watched it get longer! It was that quick – mere moments. As I stood up I found my knees were aligned and my pelvis felt straight. As I walked away the sponginess in my hip had vanished and it all felt solid and strong. That strength has remained to this day and walking no longer hurts like it used to. With everything realigned my spine felt better too, and I can also tilt my head back without pain, and bring it forward again without the bones grinding!! God is amazing.

Marion – Heaven’s Roar author

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Stephanie Reardon is a woman who cares for people in her home, from invalid in-laws to homeless acquaintances. She simply says “God said we should care for each other.” So no wonder when it was her turn for compassion Jesus Himself showed up.

Stephanie’s daughter Kayla was born with Carbomile Phosphate Synthesis (CPS) disease. Her body couldn’t handle protein and turned them into poisons which she couldn’t flush out, so they ended up in her brain killing brain cells. This created cerebral palsy. What’s more, she was the only person in the world with this particularly nasty version of CPS, and the only person who’d ever survived it past birth. The doctors were surprised she that lived, then surprised that she moved, then surprised that she walked. She was a miracle case from the start.

At age 8 when Kayla fell and broke her elbow, her body produced extra protein to heal the bone and she became totally paralysed. She was transferred around hospitals, on and off life-support, and finally sent back to Wanganui hospital to die. But she defied doctors again by returning home for one final Christmas. Eventually she slipped into a coma, re-entered hospital on a Friday and on the Monday Stephanie was asked to sign a non-resuscitation order. Though Kayla had been in a coma and totally unresponsive for days, Stephanie spoke to her and asked her if God was calling her and if she wanted to go home to Him. At that Kayla squeezed her hand, sat up, looked at her and the nurse, and smiled. That Thursday Stephanie went outside to gather herself and pray. Suddenly from a clear sky came a massive lightening bolt and it poured with rain. That was the point that Kayla had slipped away. Stephanie lay with her, and the room and corridor were packed like sardines as family, friends, teachers, aides, and even hospital kitchen staff came to say farewell to a little girl who’d had an enormous impact, even on those who'd only seen her in a coma. Spontaneously everyone, even non-Christians, began to sing "Rejoice in the Lord".

But when the undertaker came Stephanie said she had to have time alone with her. She held her hand and as she sang her favourite song from Barnie the Dinosaur, she felt a tap on her shoulder. She sat up and looked around and saw Jesus standing there. He had long dark hair and a beard – but her main description of Him was of indescribable beauty. She was in awe and love poured off Him and the love she felt for Him in that moment was heavy – an enormously electrifying body buzz as love flooded the room and flowed between them. He said “No matter what I’ll always be there for you and always love you.” Then He moved aside and Kayla came forward from behind Him. She was dancing like a little ballerina and saying “Mummy look, I can walk, I can dance, I can talk.” Her strawberry blonde pigtails bounced as she danced and twirled. Then Jesus came back to the centre and said “It’s time for us to go” and again, “I’ll always be there no matter what.” Then He put His hand out as a gesture to her and said “I love you” – took Kayla’s hand and they walked away. Both were wearing white, yet had gold all around them. Kayla said “Mummy I love you” and then they were gone.

Stephanie now doesn’t feel she’s lost Kayla, just that she’s returned to her Father. She knew she would not be long on earth, knows that she’ll see her again, and says “so let’s rejoice in God’s love forever.”

Stephanie – Ingester Street, Brethren Bible Chapel

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Forget manna from heaven – how about plasters from heaven? On Thursday 12 October 2006 at the supermarket I finally remembered to buy plasters. I thought “the way God’s been lately, this probably means I’ll need them tonight!” When I ran out months ago I double-checked the drawer and, yes, all plasters were gone – there were no hidden singles and no other packs. During Thursday evening I’d rummaged all through that drawer again looking for a certain hair clasp and around 11pm I also got some ointment from it. I’d literally never ransacked that drawer before as much as I did that day. Near 1am I leaned over to the CD to play a certain worship song (I hadn’t had my fill of Him yet and was still swimming in His loveliness) and as I leaned I cut my knee on a huge slab of rose quartz on my floor. It bled like a river so I’m laughing “yay I have plasters – I’ll need many” cos the fancy transparent ones I’d got were no match for this. But God had His usual abundance in mind and used them as a lure – if I hadn’t bought them I wouldn’t have gone to the drawer where I found – sitting there smack in the middle on top of everything – a big chunky unmissable open pack of heavy-duty brown plasters of the type you have to cut with scissors. They had a weird curved shape – just right for knees. They weren’t there when I got the hair clasp and still weren’t there when I got the ointment. And the writing on them is in French! (I asked Him if that was just to show me they’re from “out of town”.) It’s been said that God is an Englishman – there’ll be a riot when they find out He’s French. Ooh-la-la!

In the bible, when Jesus spoke of our Father, the word He used was “Abba” which means “Daddy” (and pre-dates naff 1970s bands by at least 2000 years). He cares for us with tender detail and even says “every hair on our head is numbered”, so it follows that He would materialise a pack of plasters fit for a heavy job in order to show His great love and His attitude that “no job’s too small” when it comes to blessing His children. My God gave me a plaster for my knee (everyone say “aaawww”) and left them open on top of the new pack I’d put in there earlier. And I’m pretty sure my cat didn’t do it. I went through the usual mind-mangle – “what if they were jammed up under the basin all these years and finally fell down” etc but there was nowhere they could’ve jammed, and anyway, they wouldn’t have been in French! He’s unbelievable. All attempts to rationalize fell flat.

Marion – Heaven’s Roar author

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Sometimes God just likes to play. Anyone who knows Him knows that (after all, His own advice is to “become as a child to enter heaven”). One day I saw a lovely painting of a floating feather with the inscription of Psalm 91:4, which says He’ll cover us with His feathers and we can seek refuge under His wings. Jesus also said He was like a mother hen who wanted to gather His people under His wings like chicks and protect them.

When I saw the painting I was reminded of a side of God I hadn’t thought of for a long time. And I spoke to Him about it. After that He poured feathers over me everywhere. No sooner had I finished vacuuming than I’d turn around and a white fluffy feather was suddenly in the midst of my spotless red rug where no feather had been a moment before. I opened my desk drawers at work and 2 white fluffy feathers greeted me. I’d look down, pat the cat, straighten up, and there would be a white fluffy feather on my knee. I have dozens that came literally of out nowhere.

But best of all – I was eating a Brazil nut and as they’re quite big I took a bite, put my hand down for a moment, went to eat the rest of the nut and there poking out from between my fingers was – yep – a 5cm long white fluffy feather (I know it’s size cos it’s in a frame on my wall, along with the rest). God manifested it out of thin air half way through my Brazil nut. He just loves to love me.

Marion – Heaven’s Roar author

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I had grown up in a house with rather dark spirits in it. I don’t know its history but they were there when we got there, and then got worse with 2 people in the house involved in occultism. Even our tenants saw the tall black shapes walking past doorways and experienced the demonic “tricks”. Years later as a Christian involved in deliverance and spiritual warfare my prayer partners and I decided to get rid of them. It was a large house and I had not been into the lounge in about a year because to me, the atmosphere felt icy and metallic. Yet we began our prayers in the lounge. Finally we all verbalized spiritual interference coming from a certain spot and on investigating it turned out that my grandmother’s crystal ball was in the very spot. She had called herself a white witch and was a leader in a Rosicrucian Lodge. I was asked to remove the ball and all I could think of was “out of sight out of mind” so I took it to the other end of the house and put it underneath a pile of napkins in the dining room china cabinet.

Returning to prayer, the 3 of us then kept seeing the same vision – the crystal ball was flying through the glass lounge doors, smashing them, and rolling into the middle of the room. Finally, our main intercessor said “It’s still here – what on earth did you do with it?” – and while saying this she stood up, walked to the other end of the house, entered the dining room, opened the china cabinet, went straight to the bottom shelf, lifted the piles of table mats and napkins, and looking up at me (I’d followed her) told me to get rid of it!

I did, and after that the atmosphere in the lounge was never icy again and I began to use the room. My father voiced his surprise saying he’d wondered if he’d ever see me in the lounge again!

This spiritual bloodhound is the same woman who God used as the prophet to receive and speak the Scrolls under End Times Prophecies on this website.

Marion – Heaven’s Roar author

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I got a job with shift work. The only problem was the shift was on Sundays so I was missing church. I knew I needed to be spiritually fed and was missing out on the encouragement of the teaching and worship, but I also knew God had put me there for that time for a reason. So I said “God, please open my eyes to see what you want me to do here and meet the people to want me to meet, but you know my heart and that I want to be in church on Sundays. When the time is right, please change my shifts so I can do this.” I prayed about it from time to time, but I knew He’d heard the first time and I left it in His hands.

Three months after my prayer for Sunday’s off I had a dream in which God showed me my new roster. I saw it as clear as day – Tuesday to Saturday.

In the meantime I was able to help a woman I met go through a painful time. She’d been ripped off and was looking after 4 kids alone working 12 hours a day. As a solo mum I know how hard that is. I also gave her the phone number of a free lawyer who was able to help her. I told her I felt God would bring her through and she would not have to pay one cent of a debt she knew nothing about that had been set up in her name. God did it. She was set free from that burden without paying a penny. God also led her into a situation where she has more time with her kids. So my job there was done and now I hoped for my Sundays to myself.

Three months after the dream of my new roster my manager came and told me I’d been given new shifts and showed me them to check it was OK with me. It was exactly the same roster as I’d seen in my dream. Exactly the same. I said “Yes that’s fine thank you” and inside I shouted “Hallelujah! Thank you Jesus!” In His love for a struggling ripped-off woman, God took me out of my feeding zone for a few Sundays so I could feed someone else. God is Good – He loves us all.

Norma – Life Harvest Church

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I was in London and became really worried about a friend back in New Zealand – so worried that I prayed for days for her. The concern did not leave me so I began to fast and pray. I was finally able to phone her to see what was going on. It turned out her husband (a previously lovely guy) had become violently abusive, threatening to stab her during the days I’d been praying for her and trying to knock her locked door down the night before I phoned, to get at her with a knife. I was on the other side of the world, yet God forcefully told me she needed prayer. He has a wonderful way of taking care of His own and miraculously using His people to care for others.

Another time, I was up north of Auckland standing on Bethels Beach. It was a lovely day and a friend was swimming not too far out. He was a strong swimmer, a big guy with a barrel chest and huge shoulders. He’d recently got out of Rimutaka prison after a 5-year lag so was enjoying the sea. Suddenly as I watched I began to pray for him to be safe. My prayers grew more fervent as if there was some danger involved, even though nothing had changed and he seemed to be enjoying himself. When he got back to shore a few minutes later he told me he’d been caught in a rip tide and was swimming for his life and almost being smashed into the rocks.

To intercede (this type of prayer) means “go between” and God uses us to ‘stand between’ a person and their fate. Jesus “ever lives to intercede for us” (Hebrews 7:24,25). It’s what He’s been doing for the last 2000 years!

Marion – Heaven’s Roar author

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It was early November 2006. A friend needed money and asked me for a certain amount. I said “sweet az” and gave it. It was all I had and I didn’t know it at the time, but the next day I ended up needing money myself for something but thought I was out of luck cos I’d given it away the day before. I knew there was no money in that wallet, but I heard a voice saying to look anyway. So I did. The voice – it was the Holy Spirit – said to check the back of the wallet. I never put money in the back of my wallet so I would never have checked there if the Holy Spirit hadn’t told me to. But I checked, even though I knew for sure that wallet was empty and when I looked, there in the back was exactly double the amount I’d given away the day before. Exactly double. Not only that but it was also exactly the amount I needed.

Jay – Life Harvest Church

“My God will provide all your needs according to His riches in glory” – Philippians 4:19

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In May 2006 I received two surprise healings: suddenly I had enough strength in my left arm to steer in reverse down my driveway after getting a false elbow in 2002; and I could put my trousers on normally for the first time in 11 years after receiving spinal damage. I hadn’t asked for this and hadn’t been prayed for. But I had been spending time lost in God’s presence night after night. It wasn’t because I was being all ‘religious’ but cos He was coming to visit and overpowering me. It was a beautiful mingling of spirit with Spirit and I eventually called it being “kidnapped” by Him. During one of these times, He must’ve healed me. What amazes me most is that these incredible and significant healings went almost unnoticed because the beauty of His presence took all my attention – I only realised a couple of days later that I was putting on trousers and reversing with my left arm, without even thinking about it .

Marion – Heaven’s Roar author

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Jesus Christ is not for the shallow. He is a God who will use the weak to confound the strong. He tests us, tries us, changes us, and shapes us into noble and humble images of Himself while bringing out our own uniqueness. When He was on earth the Father tested Him ferociously (Mt. 4:1-11). He also tests us ferociously – if we’re serious about Him. The bible says we’re put through the fire to be purified like fine gold (Mal. 3:3) and tells us to be glad about it. In fact, the original language says to “leap with joy” in our fiery trials! (1 Pt. 4:12-13.) When God sends these trials they can be extreme. Catholics call it the Dark Night of the Soul, modern churches call it a Wilderness Experience which refers to how the Father drove Jesus into the wilderness to be tested before His ministry began. But the result of being refined is to be more like Him so His majesty, power, and incredible love flow out through us. No – the One who laid aside His glory to be tortured to death by us, for us, to bring our spiritual release, is definitely not for the shallow.

Lucy prayed a dangerous prayer – to find God. His answer was to reveal to her the reality of the spiritual kingdoms. She was haunted so severely that those around her questioned her sanity. She had a tough choice to make. She’d seen the reality of God and our adversary the devil. She knew it was real and that she was neither imagining it, nor losing her mind. She had to choose between Truth and all who opposed her.

Lucy says… It was March 1982 and I was sitting in a small marijuana patch we had growing at the back of our property. I was looking at the beauty of nature and had been thinking about whether there was a God. I’d been dreaming into the future a lot too – having dreams that were then coming true – including dreaming about the attempted assassination of Ronald Reagan which then happened. So I’d already begun to realise there was more to life than just what could be seen with our eyes.

A Dangerous Prayer and the Hauntings Begin
Among the loveliness of the sunny day and my patch of greenery I thought it was all too amazing to be random and prayed “God, if you’re there show yourself to me.”

I came back down to the house and within half an hour the phone rang. It was the unmistakable voice of a guy I knew who’d recently hung himself. He knew stuff about me he’d never known in life, told me things about my situations that no-one knew, and said I had to sort out some relationship issues. Although we’d known each other I wasn’t that close to him that I would’ve wanted to imagine him phoning me from the grave! So I was instantly convinced that we live in a spiritual world and I hadn’t really known that before so God was already starting to answer my prayer to reveal Himself.

A week or so later I moved in with some friends. It was only temporary to fill the rental gap while one of them went overseas. While I was there I began to have many spiritual encounters, which my friends also noticed. We all heard the piano playing by itself, there were footsteps on the veranda outside but no-one was there and then the front door was violently flung open even though it was locked. At one point I saw a foot on the stairs. There was no body attached to it – just the foot! Even though my friends personally experienced bizarre things they refused to believe them and also refused to believe me when I tried to point out what they themselves had seen. I couldn’t understand why they’d deny their own eyes.

Within a month Easter came and my hands and feet began to permanently ache in the places that I later found out were where the nail wounds were on Jesus. I was starting to feel like Him, even though I still knew nothing about Him.

My attitude to these events was one of curiosity. I thought they were kind of fun – exciting – because I was looking for spiritual experiences. But they soon became frightening.

A Demonic Manifestation
When I moved back home and told my parents about everything that had happened they thought I’d gone psychotic and began to insist I had to go on anti-psychotic medication. I had to continually argue for my sanity with my parents, insisting it was real and I wasn’t mad. One night during a fight there was a knock on the front door. The dog barked at the knock so I knew I hadn’t imagined it, but when I answered it no-one was there. Then a chill went through me and I saw a demon staring at me from the garden. It was black with orange eyes and was floating above the hedge. A feeling of pure evil poured off it. By that stage because of my spiritual interests I’d bought some books on the occult. Even these books said that demons could be banished in the Name of Jesus. I commanded it to go in Jesus’ Name and it moved further away but didn’t leave. So I commanded it again and it vanished. Much later I found the biblical verses about how Jesus has conquered all darkness and has all authority and a Name above all names, to which every knee will bow (Philippians 2:10, Luke 10:17-19).

God Reveals Himself at my Lowest Point
Neither my friends nor my family believed I was being haunted by spiritual beings and I felt totally alone. My prayer that God would show me Himself had been in March and it was now September and I’d been terrified, tired out, and had no support. I felt majorly betrayed.

In bed one night I was feeling wretched, alone, and misunderstood. I wasn’t praying but a beautiful golden light suddenly appeared in front of me. Then silver stars appeared like a scene of the night sky. One star was bigger than the rest and hovered over a manger. I realized I was watching a vision of the birth of Christ and the whole nativity story unfolded before my eyes! The figures were all small, like figurines, and were made of gold light. I saw Joseph and Mary and the donkey, then Jesus in a cradle – and the vision ended with Jesus on the Cross. Then it dawned on me who God really was and a simple thought came to mind: “Oh – so God is actually this Jesus.” I knew He’d not only answered my prayer but had revealed Himself to me at my lowest point. (“If you seek Him you shall find Him” – Hebrews 11:6.)

Threats and the Hard Choice for Truth
I couldn’t tell anyone about this beautiful vision because the opposition from friends and family to my spiritual experiences was extreme. I’d been told that if I said another word about anything spiritual I’d be admitted for psychiatric treatment! It was a frightening time because I now knew God was real and that eventually I’d have to follow Him, regardless of what others thought or what the cost was to my relationships. But I was more frightened of the threats of psychiatric hospital than I was of the demons.

While I’d initially found the experiences exciting, God’s push to make me choose and follow Him became intense. Now that I knew the truth I had to do something with it. He’d shown me Himself and now the stakes were being upped to force my hand. I began to get hit in the head in bed at night. Real whacks by demons. Then a false Jesus came to the end of my bed. It looked like I thought Jesus should look like, but it was shadowy and felt “wrong”. I sensed it was trying to trick me into following it, but not following God and that didn’t make sense to me. I rejected it because it felt “dark” and when I did, it vanished. I now know there is such a thing as the false Jesus, and Christians are aware of this trick of the devil. It’s the false Jesus that steals grace, love, power, and nobility. It creates self-righteousness, harsh judgements, and the ‘religiosity’ which brings spiritual death. The bible says “the letter of the [religious] law kills but the Spirit gives life” (2 Cor. 3:6). I decided I wanted the beauty and warmth of the real Jesus. The threats of treatment freaked me out but I had to follow Him.

Not long after this a friend turned up who used to sing in my brother’s band. She’d since become a Christian and invited me to her church. I went, and from that night on God began to speak to me directly, telling me where to turn in the bible to answer my questions and those of my friends. For example, one night I was challenged on my new beliefs by one of my friends. I’d been out drinking and went back to a friend’s house who began to attack Christians. He brought out a book on Indian gods and I said I felt that they were just idols and not the Creator God. He told me to prove that Jesus was the true God and I said I couldn’t but God could. So he went and got his mother’s bible. I’d only been a Christian for two weeks and didn’t know any scriptures but I prayed for a relevant verse. I heard God’s voice tell me to turn to 1 Cor. 8:4. It said “Now concerning the things of idols … there is only one God.” The guy who’d challenged me was amazed and said I must’ve known the verse already, but thankfully he knew me well enough to believe me when I said I didn’t.

Gradually I began to attend church regularly. As the presence of Jesus grew in my life, the haunting vanished and so did the strife. My relationship with my family was healed as they saw, through me, that being a Christian didn’t mean being psychotic and wasn’t dangerous.

Years later I was having bad pain in my heart. I was diagnosed with two heart murmurs in the USA which were confirmed with a follow up ECG. Back in NZ I went to a healing meeting. The pain vanished. Later, when I got pregnant, I had another ECG as a precaution and that test showed I’d been completely healed. The murmurs had totally gone, there was no sign of anything wrong, and all was normal. Yay! Jesus had healed me at that meeting!

My relationship with God is now incredibly personal and He speaks to me in so many ways. The big and small miracles continue even to the extent that when I phoned this story to the editor I got through even though she was online and has no broadband which meant her phone shouldn’t have worked. She said she’d just been thinking about me and had planned to go offline shortly and phone me. A moment later her phone rang and we were both amazed I got through!

[Editor’s note: I tested everything I could about that line the next day, as I had no automatic online disconnection set up. But I’d been having quite a few miracles myself at the time and God was pouring Himself out on me. When I told Lucy about it and about still being online even while we were talking she casually said “Oh – another miracle!”]

He speaks to me often in dreams and visions. The friend who’d introduced me to church, later went through God’s fiery trials and emerged purified like fine gold and with a relationship with God that is far closer than ever before. But during those trials whenever I prayed for her all I saw were dark clouds around her. After a long time, I suddenly saw her surrounded by golden light. I jumped on the phone to find out what had happened and sure enough, Jesus had unexpectedly begun to fill her with the golden glow of His light and love. This is something totally out of our control as He tests and strengthens our faith. I was amazed that God had shown me His light in her from 200 miles away – within days of it happening!

Later she told me that a prophecy I’d given her years before had come true in every detail and related to 13 other prophecies she’d received. God is truly amazing!

Lucy – Intercessor

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Peter Whaanga – ex Mongrel Mob President – recounts his inspirational story of how Jesus came to him, gave him hell, and then gave him a mission of love to work with those in need. The enormous power of the resurrected Lion roared into Peter’s life and he was shown the reality of the spiritual realms. He experienced the love and power of God in his heart and in physical healing. He was taken out of his body and shown the reality of hell for an entire night. He was covered in love and given ongoing compassion for the downtrodden. All within weeks of entering jail. Jesus took this Mobster and turned him inside out. What a God!!

Peter says…
I began drinking at 9 years old and selling drugs a few years later. I formed the Stokes Valley chapter of the Mongrel Mob when I was 13 and stayed in the Mob till I was in my 20s. Most of the Stokes Valley chapter ended up inside so I went through different chapters around Wellington and up north. I was in the Hastings chapter when I left the club and I took a serious beating for giving in my patch. My life was a cycle of drugs and violence – it was all I knew.

In 1996 I was sent to Rimutaka Prison on a 5-year sentence. I was out of the Mob by then but still selling a lot of drugs. I did 21 days in the remand block before being transferred to the main prison. I thought “cool, back in the mainstream” but it was then that my whole life changed. I became a Christian 2 or 3 weeks later and one of the many miracles God did was to have me released after doing only 4 months of that 5-year lag. God did a fast work and told me “there’s much work for you to do.”

My Transformation Begins
When I entered the main block, the moment I got to my cell a guy called King Hazel walked in behind me and asked straight out if I knew Jesus. He was only a little guy but said God had told him to protect me. I threatened his life and he ran away, but my heart was stirred by it so much that it bothered me. I could feel the stirring physically over my heart and it didn’t stop, it kept bugging me.

One night in my cell I decided to get sarcastic with God. I cried out “God if you’re real prove yourself to me and I’ll honour you and serve you all my life.” Although I was being sarcastic His presence suddenly filled the cell. It was overwhelming. I felt Him embrace me so powerfully He took my breath away and I was panting for air. A beautiful smell surrounded me and all around me, inside and out, I was consumed with love and warmth and incredible comfort. It was the safest I’ve ever felt in my life. I heard His voice and He said “I love you and I’ve always loved you.” All the fear and the demons ran! I was left feeling naked and I burst into tears.

I had the reputation as a hard-man to uphold – it was my safety – but I couldn’t stop crying! I sobbed and my whole body shook. I was on the cell floor for 5 hours. My body was like jelly and I couldn’t get up. That night God delivered me of every fear –- the hate, the anger, the demons, the drug and alcohol addictions. Habits that all the drug programmes I’d been sent to couldn’t break, were broken by God right there. I was set free from everything. I was also healed from the voices in my head that had told me what to rob or do violence to. I’d acted on those voices and suddenly they were gone and my mind was clear. My lungs and kidneys were healed from all the damage they’d suffered from years of drug abuse. The power of God was on me and I was begging “That’s enough God, I’m freaking out – stop” but He said “I haven’t finished proving myself to you yet.” And He showed me visions of what would happen and what He wanted from me.

At one point my body strengthened and I felt pushed and urged to grab the cell bible and open it. I didn’t understand why because I couldn’t read. I was illiterate. However, when it opened at the Gospel of Matthew and I looked at it I could suddenly read every word! There was a pen there too and I picked it up and began to write! Now – you’ve got to put yourself in my shoes to know how this felt – but one second I couldn’t read or write, and the next second I could! God gave me the ability instantly. He literally zapped me with it. Later, on the outside I used it to get training in drug counselling. After He’d finished proving Himself He said to me “Go forth and tell the world what I’ve done for you” meaning the miracles that happened that night and the ones that were yet to come.

Not long after God came, satan fought back. I’m a big man but I got thrown off the walls of my cell like a ragdoll by the invisible hands of demons. I could feel the pressure of their hands on my body. Like being picked up by the leg, I was thrown on the floor and bounced off the walls. Not long after that I was given a journey into hell.

A Night in Hell
Lock-up in jail was at 8pm. We had to stand outside our cell doors so they could do a head count and all at the same time we had to take a step backwards into our cells. Then the warden would come along the row and lock the doors. I was third from the end and was sitting on my bed by the time the warden got to me. By now I was already a Christian. The warden closed the cell door which meant no-one could see what would happen in the very next moment. The second I heard the key turning in lock I felt searing pain like hot coals run from the soles of my feet right through my body. I hit the floor screaming in agony, but no sound was coming out. In each cell there’s an emergency button behind glass and I tried to smash the glass to push the button but I couldn’t reach it. I couldn’t stand up - my body wouldn’t respond and the pain was excruciating. Suddenly I was taken right out of my body and catapulted into the rotting filth of hell.

I landed on my knees in a very confined space. It felt like I was in an invisible box and even though I was crouched down the ceiling was right over my head. I covered my head with my arms – I wanted to look around but I was too scared. Fear was everywhere. Everyone was screaming. I was screaming. The stench of burnt rotting flesh was everywhere. I could taste it and even feel it. As I knelt there, screaming with my head covered, my flesh fell off my bones and got eaten by maggots and then was suddenly back on me again. The pain and fear was something I’d never felt anything like before, or ever imagined. I felt every kind of pain going. In the past I’d been stabbed, run over by a car, seriously beaten, but nothing compared to the pain of hell. It was like having every pain I’d ever suffered, including emotional pain, all rolled up together and magnified a million times. I screamed to God “What am I doing here? God you said if I gave myself to you I’d never come to hell!”

Although I had my head covered I was aware that there were thousands of people there. They were all screaming and cursing God. Everywhere I could hear people swearing and blaspheming God and cursing His name. I’d heard blasphemy before but nothing like this! Between the cursing they cried out “I believe in you now Jesus, give me another chance. Save me.” Then I heard the voice of God. He spoke so gently saying “It’s too late my child. I tried to warn you but you wouldn’t listen. It’s too late.” Then the people shouted “When? When did you warn me? When? When?” And they returned to cursing Him.

Within my limited view I could see what looked like an Elizabethan lady. She wore an Elizabethan dress with the wide skirts. She was about 30 years old but I was aware that she’d been there for hundreds of years. She was also screaming out “When did you warn me?” Then I saw bits of her life played in front of me like on a movie screen. I saw how she’d been shown the gospel and turned her back. Time and again she’d been told about God and how Jesus had died for her, and each time she’d turned her back. I saw people standing at the door of her house – a big mansion – trying to talk to her about Jesus but she shut the door on them and turned her face away. Suddenly on top of all the other agonising pain, I felt the pain that God felt – it was the pain of losing a child. The lady kept saying “Give me one more chance” and God kept saying “It’s too late” and His pain was huge. Then she began to curse Him again and everyone cursed Him and the cursing rose up like a wave. [Editor’s note: God will not cross our free will. If we choose against His life (love, beauty, health etc) we choose all that He’s not, ie every foul thing. Those turning from the righteousness in Jesus are often turning from the past self-righteousness of the cultural Church. Do not be deceived – they are not the same thing! Jesus repeatedly condemned the hypocritical traditions of men.]

Worse than the pain, was a terrible terrible thirst. There was a dreadful thirst for water but worse still was a spiritual thirst for God – for Jesus, the Living Water. That thirst for the Spirit of God was the worst thing of all. It was utter torture because He wasn’t there! The souls there were yearning and thirsting for something they also hated. It was a thirst that brought torment and could never ever be quenched. I cried out “Help me Jesus” and suddenly His presence came to me in hell. He said “I’ve come to take you back.” The very next moment I was back in my body, on the floor of my cell, and I heard the key turning again as the warden unlocked the door. It was the next morning – I’d been in hell all night. Symbolically, I was taken there the moment the key turned to lock the prison cell, and I was brought back the moment the key was turning again to unlock it!

It took 6 months to get the stench of hell out of my nostrils! That stench of burnt rotting flesh. I couldn’t walk properly for months either, because the pain I’d suffered had affected my body - both the physical pain that had run up me from the soles of my feet, as well as the spiritual pain and tension from being in hell while still being attached to my body back on the cell floor. My partner (now my wife) visited me the next day and knew something had happened because I couldn’t move properly. I was walking like an old man. But I didn’t tell her for a long time exactly what had happened.

After seeing the intensity of hell as well as feeling the intense all embracing love of God I was afraid of backsliding and kept praying fervently that nothing would get in the way of my faith. I prayed “God don’t let me backslide, don’t let me backslide.” Finally I saw a vision of God with His hands up to His mouth like a megaphone and He called out to me “Don’t go where it’s slippery.” That was when I learned He has a sense of humour. Every time I tell that story to Christians they laugh knowingly and often tell me something humorous He’s done or said to them too. [Editor’s note: We’re made in His image and if we like to laugh, how much more does He like to laugh! He is the Spirit of Joy.]

I believe the reason God showed me hell was because He wanted me to see His heart and the pain He felt for the people there. Because I’ve seen and experienced hell, I don’t want even the worst of the worst to go there. It’s no place for people. We need to be saved from it and seeing it gave me great compassion. Now I work in “Drug Arm” and am out on the streets in the night, helping anyone who needs it. I’ve given the shoes and socks off my feet to those who had none because I can always go home and put on another pair but they can’t. “Let he who has two coats, give one to someone who has none” – Luke 3:11.

Spiritual Power
For about 2 years after God showed me hell, I could see demons on people. I still can, but not as clearly or as often as then. I always knew if people were doped up – I saw a pale veil over the faces. After I was released I even knew if people had drugs on them when they walked into my house. I’d been dealing it all my life and now I wouldn’t have it in the house and would say “You’ve got some of that gear on you – you’d better get that outside if you want to come in here.” They’d go “How did you know?” But it was because I could see the demon. I don’t think the demons are in the drugs themselves, but because they’re mind altering they open a door to let the demons in.

Rimutaka Revival
The night I was healed in prison, when God pinned me to the cell floor and drove away every bad thing, my partner who was dealing for me on the outside also lost the urge to sell and gave away the drugs! We realised later it had happened the same night! My nephew was dealing too and when the word went out that I’d become a Christian he rocked up to see me, all leathered up, thinking he was going to knock some sense into me and said “I heard you got religion”. I just hugged him and when I did he fell to the floor and got filled with the Holy Spirit right there and then. He spent the whole visit on the floor, and went home a Christian!

About 70% of the guys in our unit, and even some of the screws, became Christians. It was a real revival and it all began with the little guy King Hazel - ex Mobster – who’d turned up in my cell that first day and asked me if I knew Jesus. After God healed me I began to pray with King in his cell. One night there was a “knock knock” on the door and a big Samoan said “what are you guys doing?” We said “we’re praying. You wanna come and join us?” So he did. The next night it was “knock knock” again, and two Samoans came and joined out prayer session. Before long there was no room in the cell and we asked the Super if we could use the church room. We were allowed to and in the end even the visitors from the churches on Sundays, or from Prison Fellowship would come and ask us guys to pray for and minister to them, because the anointing of the Holy Spirit was on us so strongly. When I got out and began going to church I found out that “cell groups” are smaller groups of people from a church that meet in someone’s home during the week for prayer or study. I said “yeh, we had a cell group in a cell.”

God’s Battles
During this revival another Mobster decided he wanted to become a Christian. He was a patch member and we knew that giving up his patch would mean a serious bashing for him. He asked me what to do and all I could do was point out what Jesus had gone through for his sake – allowing Himself to get beaten, tortured, spat on, and nailed to a Cross. He decided that if Jesus died for him, he could at least take a beating for Jesus. The last time I saw that guy he was being carried out on a stretcher and taken to hospital. He was transferred to another prison after that for his own safety, but I know he showed amazing courage for Jesus. I also knew that the guys who did it knew I was the one who’d led him to Jesus and out of the Mob.

Soon afterwards I had another vision. I was falling down a long pit really fast. The sides of the pit had spikes sticking out and I was twisting and turning as I fell trying to avoid the spikes but they were still cutting me as I passed them. The ground was flying up towards me and wham! - I hit it. Then I noticed the ground was writhing with snakes. I went to jump up but suddenly the snakes were as tall as buildings. They hovered over me spitting their poison and striking at me but they couldn’t touch me. Then the vision ended.

The very next day I found out what the vision meant. I was in the courtyard and eight Mobsters surrounded me. I knew it was payback time for leading their patch member to Jesus. Because I hadn’t been a Christian that long myself, I thought I was going to have to fight my way out of the situation. I balled my hand into a fist but when I drew my arm back I felt an invisible hand clamp onto my wrist. It was so strong I couldn’t move my arm. God held my fist and I heard Him say “Stand strong for me son.” Then even before I’d thought about it I raised my other hand, open and to the sky, and said “I love the Lord Jesus”. That was all it took. They ran. All eight of them scattered! After that I felt a bit cocky and when I saw them regrouped in a corner of the courtyard I walked right through the middle of them saying “Praise the Lord!” Again they fled! Only then did Jesus remind me of the vision of the snakes. The spirits in those guys were terrified of the Spirit of God.

Continuing Healing
After I was released I still had a problem with violence and I knew I couldn’t marry my wife until I was healed of it. One Sunday we were all in church and God told the pastor I needed to be released from a demon of violence. He began to pray over me and I fell to the floor and began to manifest the thing. He kept commanding it to come out of me in the name of Jesus, and I could hear it saying “Pretend you’re asleep, pretend I’ve gone, lie still” but the pastor could still see it and kept praying. My face was so twisted up I was unrecognisable and as I roared loudly, right in front of my future wife, my kids, and the whole church, it came out of me. I felt so free I lifted up the pastor and ran around the hall with him shouting “Praise Jesus”.

God also healed me of substantial deafness, which had given me a speech impediment. I attended a healing meeting and the man put his fingers in my ears and prayed. I heard a “pop-pop” and I could suddenly hear properly. I used to slur, now I don’t. I used to wear a hearing aid, now I don’t. God is good!

Lay Down Your Life
Much later, released and working with Drug Arm at the time, I was out on the street one night offering food and blankets and prayer to anyone in need. At 3am I gave my last pie to a guy, and another guy came up and decided he wanted the pie for himself. He was angry about it and threatened the first guy’s life. He had a screwdriver that had been filed to a spike and he said he’d kill the man if he didn’t give him the pie. But it wasn’t even about the pie, he was after trouble and as he went to stab him I got in the way and stood in front the screwdriver which was right over my heart. I said “This is not the way – Jesus is the way.” It was another example of demonic control cos the guy foamed at the mouth and ran away cursing God. When I got home it sunk in what I’d done and I cried – not from fear but because of what God showed me. He said “You laid down your life for another.” I was blown away.

Care for One Another
When we’re out doing Drug Arm work we always try to be open to the leading of the Holy Spirit to go where God wants us to go. Because we have the vans we can be very mobile. With prayer we try to be sensitive to the promptings of the Spirit as we go out to serve people in need. One night we were driving past Frank Kitts park, pulled the van over, and got out. As soon as I got out I felt the Spirit urge me to go “quickly” into a dark corner of the park. We ran over waving our torches and we found a 14 year old girl, drugged and unconscious, lying covered in her own vomit. She was about to be raped by a 17 year old boy and when he saw our torches he ran while still pulling his trousers up. I took the girl back to the van and our female colleague cleaned her up. We gave her hot milo and held and comforted her trying to get her to speak. It was 90 minutes before she spoke. She gave us her address but was afraid to go home and was saying “please don’t take me home I’ll get in trouble.”

We managed to convince her and drove her back. I carried her to the door in my arms and we rang the doorbell. Her father answered and when he saw his daughter in my arms he wasn’t angry – he burst into tears and said “where did you find my baby?” I handed her to him and he told me his wife and another were out searching for her, and he was manning the phone. I just said we found her in the park and left it at that. Afterwards we praised God for showing us where this girl was.

God is Faithful
Now I’ve personally baptized my daughter, my son, my wife, and some of my nieces and nephews. The rest of my kids are getting interested because even though they grew up under my old influence and saw the hate and pain, they also see a lasting change. I know for sure in my heart that they’ll come to Jesus and be set free from the influence I gave them. Every day without fail for 11 years God has proved Himself, just like I asked Him to in the cell when I first called on Him just to be sarcastic! God has come through again and again. He’s got my back, He’s shown me mighty wonders, and He uses me in awesome ways.

Peter – Salvation Army

[Peter’s story continues below, in his wife Dawn’s testimony]

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Dawn Whaanga has her own stories to tell.

Dawn says…

When Pete got out of prison he was such a changed man that it led me to give my own heart to God. When I did come to God, a series of miracles followed and my life with Jesus seems to have been one healing after another.

X-rays Prove Total Healing
The first time I experienced God’s healing power was at church. A healer called Weston Carrier, from Tauranga, was praying for people and they were falling on the floor. It’s called getting “slain in the Spirit” and I was cynical about it and didn’t want to fall down in front of anyone!

But I was due for an operation for tennis elbow. Fragments of bone had chipped off and were floating free around the joint. It was very painful so I went up for healing and when I got prayed for I felt warmth flow from my fingers right up my arm. To my embarrassment I did fall down under the power of the Holy Spirit, but within a week the pain was gone. The day before my operation I had pre-op x-rays and the elbow was completely healed – no bone chips anywhere and a normal healthy elbow!

Healed from Migraines
Later, Weston came back through town and God gave him a ‘word of knowledge’ specifically about me, and told him to call me up to have prayer for migraines. I used to get bad ones that’d keep me in bed in a dark room – I couldn’t stand the slightest noise. They were hereditary, my father also had them. Because of my healed elbow I trusted Weston and went up when he called for me. I hit the floor again when he prayed, got up, and went straight back down! But after that I had no more migraines.

Healed from Death
A year after Pete and I got married I was diagnosed with a brain clot. I’d had a dull sort of headache for a week and suddenly collapsed at home. When they found me I was blue and not breathing. I’d stopped breathing for 4 minutes and they thought I’d gone. I was told it was a miracle I even came around. But Pete prayed hard!

I woke up in the ambulance, was in and out of consciousness, and woke again in hospital. In the ambulance I could hear Pete praying even though I didn’t know what was happening. He prayed without stopping all the way to hospital because he’d heard the medics say “another stroke victim – there’s no hope.”

That night, Sunday, I had a fit in hospital and all day Monday I had constant seizures. I could feel them coming but once they began I didn’t know what was happening until it was over. They did a scan and found a blood clot in my head so I was transferred to Wellington hospital on Tuesday for a full CAT scan.

The seizures were awful and I was given medication which stopped them, but it also made my brain so woozy I could no longer think properly. I couldn’t even remember the names of things. The doctors said I’d deteriorate into full brain damage and become a vegetable because I’d stopped breathing for so long.

Answered Prayer
But Pete kept on praying and God powerfully answered him. By Thursday I was back to myself. I was bored and sneaking out of bed. I’d even caused a manhunt and they found me in the toilets. Initially I hadn’t been able to hold anything in my hands, and now I could. I could also hold normal conversations and think clearly. So after Pete was told there was “no hope” on the Sunday, and that I’d be a “vegetable” on the Tuesday, just 3 days later on the Friday I walked out and came home – all because of his prayers and God’s miracle power.

A final scan before the hospital let me go showed that the clot had completely gone. But my body had been through the mill and I slept for two weeks getting my strength back. Then once again, God sent Weston Carrier to pray for me. On the third week he came back through town and demanded I go for healing.

The reality of what happened hit home when a friend died of the same thing a few months later.

God’s Grand Finalé
The final piece of God’s dealings in this situation came when the same two ambulance guys who’d taken me to hospital, pulled into a garage where a friend of ours worked as a mechanic. They were talking to each other about how Pete had prayed in the ambulance and how they’d thought I wouldn’t make it. They said that while Pete had prayed they’d watched my skin go from blue back to normal, and my body uncurl from being in a rigid seizure position. One of the guys said he was really spiritually touched by it. Our friend didn’t know they were talking about me and only found out when he mentioned the conversation and we said “that was us.” God not only answers prayer, but He has a way of letting people know when their answered prayers have touched the lives of those who witness them.

Dawn – Salvation Army

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In the original biblical text “salvation” mean “wholeness, deliverance, victory, peace, prosperity, health, welfare, rescue”. When God gives salvation He gives an ongoing journey of restoration. That’s why we’re told to “work out your own salvation in fear and trembling” – ie to grow in the steps towards wholeness. Jesus took me (the author of this website) from darkness to His light, and from satanism to salvation.

If spirituality was a drug I’d describe myself as someone who began on heroin and ended up on tea - or Living Water. I went from satanism, to black magic, to witchcraft (including eastern mysticism), to Jesus – where, like all who meet Him, I stayed. I’ve seen most sides of spirituality. But Jesus called me first and I am, and always was, His own.

My life with God begins back in the mists before time, Everyone’s does – but I’ve seen my immortal path “from before the foundation of the earth” until time ends and I’m back in His arms, because He spent most of 2006 showing me as He pulled all my life strands together in an incredibly detailed and complex way which revealed His rich tapestry. He confirmed it in so many ways, including 3 prophetic words from different people, all saying the same thing. We’re all made with a purpose that will fulfill us and bring us the highest joy. I saw how God’s Plan had affected my life. All His people are called Kings & Priests and He made me to live in the spiritual realms, to be His alone, a priestess of worship and prayer, to be “sanctified” (ie set apart) for His intense love, and to impart His beauty. I was made for “praise, love, prayer, and revelation.” So obviously satan, whose name means ‘hinderer’, tried desperately to stop it and turn it to evil. From a very young age he surrounded me with hate and ugliness until I became a priestess of the black arts. It was a direct attack against the will of God – which is satan’s whole game plan. God allowed it for a little while so I could learn about the dark kingdom that I’d later be used to help destroy. Then He rescued me, gave me wholeness, and brought me to victory. In other words – He saved me.

Called by God – Twisted by satan
When I was 4 God began to call my name on and off till I was 7. All He said was “Marion” but His voice boomed louder and deeper than thunder. It would roll, as if it was moving, across the playground and into the classroom or across the lawn to wherever I was playing. I’d turn and look in the direction it came from, but never thought anyone else could hear it – I seemed to know it was just for me. Nor did it frighten me. To my kid-brain, it was just a big loud thunderous disembodied voice calling my name.

At the same time as I first heard His thunderous voice, 2 demons turned up in my room most nights for months. I called them “the little blue man and the little green man”. Their heads were large and distorted, their shoulders were small but their bellies were big. They were 3 feet tall and stood at my pillow so we were eye to eye, and they’d say foul things about me to each other. Sometimes I ran from the room; often I was too scared to get past them. Now having actively walked a spiritual path for 38 years I know that the moment Jesus called me, satan tried to block it. The curse those demons brought was exactly what they were – slander. (The name ‘devil’ means ‘slanderer’.) Most people around me were affected by those demons and slandered and falsely accused me all my life. Gossip is slammed in scripture as bringing death – and my family was rife with it. I lost friends and extended family and the result was total isolation from love. God had made me for Himself alone but satan twisted it to cold rejection. If I wasn’t being abused I was neglected, so I learned to be both vicious and cold. Some noticed the abuse, but satan’s blindfolds were so strong that pride stopped all but a few from admitting it and changing their behaviour. I suffered the sort of things that most people find too disturbing to even hear about. I was like Cinderella, doing all the work and taking all the beatings. My heart, made for love and beauty, turned to ice and cruelty as satan attacked God’s main plan for me.

A Path of Evil
The evil had a foothold due to a vicious marriage. My upper class talented parents hated each other for years and I bore the brunt of it. At the age of 2, the beatings began by one parent because I looked too much like the other. That was a death-bed admission, but I’d already worked it out. After all, my only crime at 2 was being the mirror image of one parent. The beatings only stopped when I got old enough to fight back – at 9. I learned how to be vicious and was told that my “eyes snapped”. Later they admitted I was their scapegoat (psychologically common in dysfunction), but it didn’t change the abusive habits of a lifetime. The sad thing was that they were truly kind people – to everyone else!

At 12 I cut the apron strings and hit the streets. I was in the thick of 70s street life - drag queens, naked hippies, and every gang going - fully patched up, tooled up, and visible. I ended up with 100 big brothers with strong support from both bike and street gang members. By 13 I was labelled “officially uncontrollable” by police, but no-one had ever tried to guide me with love. I was dropping acid by 13 and smoking opium by 14. It was the safest I’d ever felt – I was untouchable because I had the protection of some very twisted people, 2 of whom finally got preventive detention, never to see the light of day again. I was a strange mixture of their little sister and their equal and was told that an evil flowed from me that made people afraid. That was because at 12 I got into satanism. I wanted people to fear me. Looking back, I know that what I really wanted was to be left alone – to not be abused.

Satanism and the Occult
I followed the directions of “the satanic bible” by Anton La Vey who founded the satanic church in San Francisco. At 13 I decided to get into black magic and within 2 weeks it was handed to me on a silver platter by satan himself. I never mentioned it to anyone – I just thought it and a coven came to me. By 14 I was the High Priestess of that black magic coven and continued to practice witchcraft for 9 years. I could think things into being with mind magic – I thought it and it happened. I spent years training my mind for psychic power (which is why I recognize it in the church for those who seek “faith techniques” so their prayers “work” – nothing to do with God’s will, everything to do with the “soul power” in their prayers – see End Times Prophecies, The Scrolls). I did full magic circles and conjured demons and elementals using centuries old rituals from ancient grimoires. I knew the names of some of the most powerful demons in the 2nd heaven – Baal, Asteroth, Flaurus, Beelzebuth. I also knew how to control them, at least they let me think I did, but really they were using me as demons always do.

Because I was created for miracles but didn’t know Jesus, I loved to do spells and see the magic work. But I had few personal desires (I was very contented – if left alone) so I mostly worked spells for others. Over time I saw a pattern that even good spells could bring serious disaster to people. Now I know it’s because black and white magic both come from the same bucket – the 2nd Heaven – the place of occultic forces and sinful human power, eg greed (Eph. 6:12). Even spells for love or to get a job are based on greed and controlling the free will of another. Control spirits are always occultic – and the church has its fair share of those too – a thing God is now judging and changing (see Other End Times Prophecies and The Changing Church). Modern occultism is so watered down that people can’t see the truth of it (a tactic of satan’s). The grimoires are no longer on the market and it’s little more than mind magic, herbs, crystals, and the electromagnetic fields (EMF) as described by the Table of Correspondences (and now scientific physics). Because we are also made of EMF (all matter produces it because all matter moves and is ‘energetic’), EMF can be manipulated to work spells outside of using demons – this is the ancient ‘wisdom’ of the occult (the word means ‘hidden wisdom’). But practitioners don’t realise that demons will still surf on these energy carrier waves. Why? Because good or bad it’s still manipulation for personal gain which hinders others’ freedom and makes selfish desire the highest goal. Of course that will attract dark forces! Also, most occultists are more than happy to use demons as well.

No Familiars
But low magic was not for me. I preferred the wonders of the spiritual realms more than just getting what I wanted. I chose not to have a ‘familiar spirit’ (a demon that does a witch’s bidding) because I didn’t want a slave. What I wanted was a spirit who could take me by the hand and guide and teach me. I wanted Jesus – I just didn’t know it. Years later He told me I’d been divinely protected through years of playing in the devil’s playground, because of my attitude. I’ve seen people who barely touched the edges of witchcraft become fully demonically possessed. But He protected me because I was seeking the life He’d created me for – to live in the spiritual realms – although satan had twisted it. I wasn’t looking to manipulate, control or curse others, or follow demons for personal power.

Calling to God
Eventually satan began to bite back – he holds out plastic roses that have real thorns! I ended up calling “God if you’re real – help.” He always did and I always said “thanks God – see you later.” I tested Him for 4 years and He saved me many times. For example, flying into Singapore a man came to me looking really worried and gave me his minister’s phone number saying that if I got into trouble to phone. But what did I want with a minister’s number? I chucked it and ended up stranded, penniless, and at the mercy of Asian junkies. I nearly died while stranded there and I’m convinced I would have without the man’s prayers. The reason he foresaw the trouble was because God had given him a ‘word of knowledge’ telling him my life was in danger. And the reason God did that was because the night before leaving NZ I’d stuck up for Jesus against an atheist and God says if we acknowledge Him, He acknowledges us (Mt. 10:32). He is true to His Word, even for witches! Although I was in the occult, I was a truth-seeker and like Pilate, I could find no fault in Jesus. I simply didn’t know I could have a relationship with Him.

God Apprehends Me
Over the years I lost many friends to drugs, speed crashes, and suicide. God kept me alive so many times. At 22 I was in a bad car crash and was told by 2 surgeons that I was “an official medical miracle case.” I should’ve died in 3 different ways, but God had other plans. Somehow an old friend heard of the accident and visited me. He’d become a Christian and talked to me about Jesus and the bible. I questioned him on the devil and knew from his answers that we were talking about the same entity. The car crash left damage and he invited me to a church healing meeting. I was prayed for and received a healing that was medically documented the next day at a routine check-up. But it wasn’t a total healing so after the prayer I angrily told God that satan could heal me so why couldn’t He? God answered by giving me wholeness instead, via a ‘misunderstanding’. He was sick of waiting for me and when I’d lifted my hand for healing, a woman thought I’d raised it for salvation. This woman who always spoke slowly due to her culture, suddenly began to talk so fast I literally couldn’t get a word in to explain that I didn’t want salvation. She got me to repeat the salvation prayer and I did cos she was so excited I didn’t want to burst her bubble – but I didn’t mean a word of it. Afterwards people cooed at me saying “my new sister” – but I harshly denied it.

Yet there is such power in the spoken word that the following Wednesday I said to myself “I suppose I’ll have to give up my interest in demonology now.” I was quite prepared to and thought no more of it. The next Sunday (my first ever ‘willing’ Sunday in church) a woman I didn’t know said that God had told her to give me a book. It was called “Deliver Us From Evil” about the deliverance ministry, which is about kicking demon butt. What the Catholics call exorcism, the bible calls deliverance and Jesus spent much of His time delivering people from demons. So from my very first Sunday, after being silently willing to totally forget about demons, God put my years of knowledge to use to help destroy them (Lk. 10:17-18).

Baptised and Finally Free
I hadn’t been in church long when a young woman asked me if I’d been involved with witchcraft. I asked how she knew. She said she could see it on me. Shortly after that I was baptised. As I came up out of the water I heard and felt a soft “click” over my heart and thought it sounded and felt like chains breaking. Immediately, the same woman came from the other side of the room and said “that was amazing – it sounded like chains breaking.” Then certain people began to speak to me who hadn’t before. Awhile later they told me that before my baptism they’d been too scared to speak to me but as I rose out of the water they felt relief flow over them and said to each other “phew it’s all over”. God had set me free from 11 years of satanism, black magic, and witchcraft.

As I grew closer to Jesus I began to feel strange. I wasn’t used to love and realised I felt ‘immortal’. I’d become aware of His Spirit in me. Later I saw the Eccl. 3:11 verse “He has made everything beautiful in its time – He has put eternity in their hearts.” God is truly a God of Beauty!

God Turns all Things to Good (Rom. 8:28)
Within 3 months I was at Bible School in Christchurch learning that “dealing with Jesus is no light thing.” One of the teachers had a deliverance ministry. He taught about the devil’s hierarchies and strategies (Eph. 2:2 & 6:11-17). From my experience I knew he was right and was fascinated to get the real truth. I discovered that while occultists fear demons and have methods to control and dismiss them, from a Christian perspective they are utterly powerless. Jesus has already defeated them on the Cross and they simply have no power against His Name! It was an eye-opener to see them in the Light of the Truth. On returning to Wellington God quickly led me to meet a woman with the same deliverance ministry and I ended up praying and ministering with her for around 3 years, nearly 6 hours most days. During this intense season of prayer and intercession God gave many revelations, visions and prophecies, including The Scrolls, which show the path to the Mantle of Divinity – a path of grace, gentleness, and delicate union with Him.

After I’d realised that the demons of the occult were the fallen angels of the bible (and already defeated by the Cross) I saw another one. I was cleaning a church alone and became surrounded by the same icy feeling I’d had while conjuring demons when the circle had been my protection. For the first time ever the hairs on my neck literally rose and I knew something nasty was very close. As I was leaving, it physically manifested. It was naked and had a head shaped like a rugby ball on sideways, which it waggled at me with a nasty sneer. I’d only just learned that these could be bound in Jesus’ Name (Mt. 16:19) but I’d never done it, was on my own, and knew it’d fight back. Being conquered doesn’t stop them from trying to win a fight through fear or deception! So I ignored it and left – quickly! That one was only an imp and God saved the real nasties for later. I’ve also had the privilege of seeing angels helping. These majestic creatures emanating light and power come to help, usually if praying over a city or large crusade. Dan. 10:13 describes how the angel Gabriel was sent to give Daniel a message but was held up for 21 days in a battle in the air with the ruling demon over Persia. Finally the Archangel Michael came to his aid and Gabriel delivered God’s message. Now, through Jesus, we have direct access to God and have the power of His Name in spiritual battles. I saw the angels at war at a Nicky Cruz crusade and they are beautiful. Cruz, also an ex-satanist, ministers to gangs so the battle was fierce.

God also used me to help a guy get out of the satanic church that had begun in Wellington. The young guy was brought to me by people who knew my background and he was amazed that I could describe the satanic ‘services’. But he was even more amazed that I thought of satan as powerless and had no fear of him. It convinced him that Jesus was greater and it was a great privilege to use my own past for God’s glory.

Miracles and Healings
In 3 years of constant prayer I saw God work wonders. He used that season to show me the difference between the thin, cold, skin-prickling demonic presence of spells, and His rich, soft, warm encompassing golden love, the gentleness of His velvet voice, the utter beauty of the visions He showed of His Kingdom, and His miracle power in prayer. People were set free from curses that had held back their lives and kept them depressed and subdued, and others were healed. One woman was due for an operation for cancer the next day and my prayer partner prayed for her in hospital. She saw a demon of cancer which she described as having feathery tendrils that ran through the woman’s body. She bound it in Jesus’ Name and saw it roll up like a scroll and vanish. In the morning the woman’s pre-op scans showed that the cancer had completely gone.

A coven so strong and successful had a shop outlet growing so fast that it headlined in a city newspaper article. In the interview they said they wanted to convert Wellington to witchcraft and foolishly mentioned the name of their familiar spirit. I bound it and within a week the coven’s ultra successful shop had closed. I also set victims of sexual attacks free from a predatory spirit that lingered and oppressed them. The demon always looked the same – even its victims would describe it as I’d seen it. Imagine my surprise when I saw a statue of the exact same beast having sex with a woman in the ruins of ancient Babylon in Iraq – one of their ancient ‘gods’.

Dark Night of the Soul
For 3 years I saw His wonders, felt His closeness, and had many prophecies over me which I recorded. But my heart still needed much softening so I could enter His eternal Plan to live with His intense love and beauty, and know His deeper revelations – because He’d made me for Himself. So amidst the blessings and miracles of prayer, God’s soft beautiful presence began to lift. God says He removes us if we don’t bear fruit, and prunes us if we do (John 15:2). I thought I was in for a pruning and asked “How long Lord?” He showed me a rolladex flicking over pausing at 3, then 17, and stopping at 21. I knew it was years – but I didn’t believe it. Then He began to shake me. The bible says He’s a “consuming fire who shakes all things so that only the unshakable remains” (Hebrews 12:27-29). He shook me to pieces and He shook me for 21 years. Catholics call it the Dark Night of the Soul, modern Christians call it a desert or wilderness experience after Jesus’ time of being tested in the wilderness, or Paul the Apostle’s years of testing in the desert. Paul’s trials were severe and in the end he became content even in prison. The September 2007 issue of Time Magazine chronicles Mother Teresa’s 50-year Dark Night. Those who know God believe this emphasizes her sainthood.

The milestones of 3 and 17 years also came true as things happened in those years that majorly changed my spiritual path. After all the wonder and glory He showered on me He vanished and I searched for Him but couldn’t find Him. One of the bible’s loveliest books, the Song of Solomon, describes this. As the Beloved vanishes, His lover searches for Him, and like that lover I never stopped searching because He’d shown me enough of Himself to know what I was missing. Jews and Christians both see this book as a picture of God’s dealings with His people – of the Dark Night and the Blessed Reunion. He shakes some of us to the very limits, removing every support, so we learn to rely only on Him. He makes us pursue Him so that we learn to move and grow and don’t get stuck in “dead religion”. Before He vanished He gave me a vision of 2 trees: one with lovely stately limbs, stiff and leafless. It was dead. The other was green, messy, and being blown in the wind of His Spirit. He was saying “move, grow – it will be messy but it will be Life.” Then a friend gave me a prophecy that He’d be with me on the strange paths. Two decades later I finally know what it means!

I kept a diary of those days of prayer and miracles and when He returned – so suddenly and unexpectedly – I checked the date of the last entry all those years before. He had returned within one week of the 21-year time-span He’d given me for my trials. Almost to the day! As promised. Nor was He absent but had taken His hand off my life as a parent teaches a kid to ride a bicycle. Just this month He gave me a vision of how I’d met Him, walked with Him, been put on an altar by Him, had flames devour me until I was liquid gold (the colour of Spirit), been poured out into a new shape, and that He’d been right there watching. He then took the new me deeply into His love. The vision confirms a 1987 prophecy which said I’d be beaten into a new shape and become the crown of love and beauty I was made to be. But it felt like He’d broken all His promises to not forsake me, even though scripture says He’ll purify us like gold in the fire! Those who go through it know the deepest distress possible. The book of Job is about these trials but after Job lost everything, God restored double and revealed His true self to Job in some of the most powerful chapters in scripture. Like Job, my blessings outweigh my trials by light years!

From Glory to Glory
2 Cor. 3:18 says He’s “transforming us from glory to glory to make us like Him”. When He returned, the heavens opened and blessings fell on me like Niagara Falls. His voice was clearer, His words more tender, His visions more beautiful, His miracles more astonishing and powerful than ever before. He brought the clearest and strongest feeling of ‘in loveness’ which He glows and expands at His will, making me laugh aloud with pure delight in the most unlikely places! One worship band sings “any time any place you invade my space, you consume me.” He’s wonderfully inconvenient as He challenges our priorities.

Heavenly Trances
He put me in trances for many hours every night for about 8 months and I’d bask in His love, in the visions He showed me, and the things He told me that proved accurate again and again. He’d come on me half way through making a coffee or whenever He chose to, and I’d come back to myself to find it was hours later. I called it being ‘kidnapped’ by Him but learned that it was true worship. It was Paradise and I experienced what the Apostle Paul called “being taken up into the Third Heaven” to be with God. These are the higher realms where God’s love, peace, power, and paradise are (2 Cor. 12:2-3). His presence was so extreme that I documented everything He did – around 200 miracles in 8 months. Many per day, big and small, manifesting things out of thin air, sudden healings, and all the prophecies I received all those years ago coming true in detail. I had such love in me I felt it burning on my face and a stranger told me my “face shone with the sort of love only found in the bible”. Jesus had not spoken to me for years, but as my trials came to a final head, I suddenly saw 2 specific demons – one attacking me and one over my suburb. Not knowing if I still had the ability to bind them (it’s dangerous to tackle them without His personal presence – Acts 19:13-16) I bound them anyway in His Name. The first of those 200-ish miracles happened literally 10 seconds later – the second one happened that night – and the snowball effect began. They’re not many per day anymore, but they’re still frequent because I’ve learned to live in His Kingdom permanently, which is what I was made for. Jesus thoroughly taught me that He Himself is Paradise and like the lover in the Song of Solomon, I’ll never let Him go. Is. 54:4-12 was prophesied to me in 1983. It’s now fulfilled with the promise that His blessings will never leave. Years ago His power fascinated me. Now I’m captivated by His Person, His kindness, His humour, and how He deals with me.

Jesus is magnificent. He is intoxicating. His love is indescribable. The Almighty Creator of galaxies calls us “His poems”. He opens His mouth and light comes out – at light-speed. He guides comets and orbits, and He is the King who died for His people –Saviour and Judge – Lamb and Lion. Yet He once told me “My majesty comes forth in my gentleness”. He is so tender, wooing us into our glory and “singing over us with great joy” (Zeph. 3:17). We have a God who sings over us.

Marion – Heaven’s Roar author

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